20 Questions with the Dickheads Of Aggression

Readers will remember that back in September, a line up of certifiable saps played an extra ‘special’ gig in Belfast. They were…the Dickheads Of Aggression. Donal couldn’t resist joining in their dim chat, and happened to transcribe it for the record.

Thanks for that, Donal.

I’LL EAT YOUR FACE (BIG TRON – drums)

Instrumental grindcore – what was the reasoning behind it?

You don’t have to be anything in particular. We play a lot with non-metal bands because we have a good impact on people who don’t listen to grind/metal/heavy music and to have a vocalist would probably kill that.

How has your full length ‘Irritant’ been received so far?

Really well. It’s been in the top 5 or so downloads from Bandcamp of Irish artists since it came out. We’ll have a new one out around April next year, more vicious and crazier hopefully.

Are there actually underlying lyrical themes to the songs?

Sometimes. We have an upcoming song about our buddy fucking his bird to AC/DC in an adjoining room and hearing the HOT PUNISHING DICKSLAMS. That image sort of suits the music in the song so it is named accordingly (‘March to the Beat of the Dickwork’). But most of the time the song is named after a certain cunt we know or thing we have done, seen, paid for, eaten, tripped over, got a rash off etc.

What were the blink-and-you’ll-miss-them vocals The Boy shouted during one of the songs?

“DIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIE – YOUFUCKINGCUNT”. It’s the song “Die Shithead”. We usually get other people up to sing on it but nobody wanted to in Belfast the other day.

Is there a better accompaniment to face eating than fava beans and a nice chianti?

Hot, powerful cans.

WILLIAM CHRIST AND THE ONE MAN ORGY (Tiberius Nyarlyhotep – Guitars / vocals)

Why. Just Why?

Why? Because we can and believe it is our destiny to do so. Because if we didn’t, it wouldn’t be done and then nobody would be doing it.

Is the Lad an actual person or just Enniskillen spides in general?

The lad is in fact a real person called Marky, who sold tiny pieces of hash for vast sums of money claiming it was better than all the other hash available because it was “…the belfast blow hi!…”

It was in fact Bordnamona peat briquette. Twat.

Is there an untapped potential market for mushroom flavoured swiss rolls?

Yes there is. In the same way that there is a market for experimental pile surgery.

‘Shot In The Bag’ – based on a true story?

Again, yes it’s very much based in reality. There were bb guns and poitin involved. I’m saying no more about that.

Can you give us an idea of subject matter for future songs?

I wasn’t aware that any of our old material had any subject matter at all, but since you ask some of the new songs are about:

Junkfood, chloroform, small cars with big men in them, symphonic destiny metal and worshipping satan.

New songtitles include
Fisted Blister
I am the shoe
Theres nothing funny about Saxon
Surrounded by Cocks
Thrashing the Muggles
Edible Pervert
Bacon Dreamcatcher vs Lurches Giant MeatShield.

MENTAL DEFICIENCY (Alex Kazam! – Guitars)

Although he was getting his nappy changed at the Dickheads gig, what’s the story with the adult baby at your gigs?

He’s Mental Man, our loveable mascot! He’s on the cover of our demo CD, ‘Musically Challenged,’ (available on iTunes, Amazon and all good online MP3 stores). He is the man who brought religion into our lives. For that we are eternally grateful to him.

He told us a story of a really inspirational man. This man was killed very violently, but through some kind of miracle he was brought back to life. He used his second chance to spread his message of justice throughout the land; a corrupt land that needed an anointed one to show them the way.

That man’s name was Robocop.

Unfortunately, when the authorities found out that we believed such a story despite the fact it is scientifically impossible and there’s no actual evidence that it happened they sectioned us! We tried to point them in the direction of the film based on his inspirational life but they weren’t having any of it. Mental Man staged a daring rescue and we escaped, wearing nothing but our straitjackets and name tags on which the doctors had written, ‘Mental Deficiency.’

We decided to spread the religion through the power of rock, and the song, ‘Automated Law Enforcement Programming,’ was born. You can hear it on our demo CD, ‘Musically Challenged,’ (available on iTunes, Amazon and all good online MP3 stores).

Are Bass Face and Shredhead so visually grotesque that they have to mask themselves?

Poor Bass Face was once a happy child full of life and wonder at the world. Then one day a freak attack by a penguin during a trip to the zoo scarred his little face. His younger brother Shredhead tried to save him, but was also injured in the attack. For years they struggled with confidence issues with the opposite sex until they met Mental Man. He reckoned that hiding their identity would create a sense of mystery that the ladies just can’t resist. And by heck he was right. These days they sometimes have to fight them off with a stick, literally. It can get like that scene in Aliens were the xenomorphs first attack. Except the aliens are yummy mums and the pulse rifles are sticks. The acid for blood is much the same though.

Speaking of Aliens, we have a song inspired by it called ‘They Mostly Come at Night…Mostly’. You can hear it on our demo CD, ‘Musically Challenged,’ (available on iTunes, Amazon and all good online MP3 stores).

Who handles most of the songwriting duties in the band?

The lyrical prophet Mr Majestic handles all the words for music. He’ll come up with a concept for the song. It’s usually an important social or political issue as everyone loves to hear rock musician’s well formed opinions on those. For example, ‘Get Her Home Get Her Bucked,’ treads over some serious philosophical territory as you can tell even from its title. I’m not sure if I’ve mentioned this yet but you can hear it on our demo CD, ‘Musically Challenged,’ (available on iTunes, Amazon and all good online MP3 stores).

Once we have the concept and some lyrics he and I will work on a structure and a rough tune, then we’ll bring it to Sgt. Marmaduke, Shredhead and Bass Face so they can contribute their ideas and flourishes. This is how the majority of our songs have been written so far, but MD is a young band. The last two we’ve done, such as Nelsaur (based on the classic 80s cartoon), have been more of a combined effort. The Mental Deficiency songwriting workflow is still developing!

Tell us a little bit about the upcoming debut album.

The upcoming album will contain some re-recordings of classic MD songs that were on our demo CD, ‘Musically Challenged,’ (available on iTunes, Amazon and all good online MP3 stores). This is because Shredhead only joined after we recorded it and felt a bit left out. Therefore, songs such as Love You Like a Movie and GHH GHB will be getting the insane guitar solo treatment.

The album will also have songs that have become popular from our live shows, such as ‘Yummy Mum,’ our ode to the beautiful older lady, and ‘The Patriot,’ which tells the story of a man who loved his country a little too much. We hope to include some bonus material with the physical release of the album but that depends on how much money we can find to put toward it. Mr Majestic and Bass Face are working the street corners behind Belfast City Hall as I type in an attempt to raise funds! Get your ass round there for a good time and to help us make the album!

What’s up next lyrically for the band?

Lyrically we will continue to do we have always done: encourage people to understand the Mental Deficiency worldview. Mainstream bands like The Beatles tell you, ‘All you need is love,’ but we say, ‘It’s called love when you milk a man’s prostate,’ (from Introduction to Seduction, available on iTunes, Amazon and all good online MP3 stores). Is one of these statements on love more justified? Bon Jovi sang, “Keep the Faith,” but what if you have faith in a Cybernetic Organism that enforces the law? Our lyrics are about humanity’s suppressed thoughts.

That, and bucking. Cause everyone loves a buck.

LESSHELP (Baggy – Vocals)

13 gigs in 16 years, how does one cope with such a grueling work ethic?

Ahhh. Well let’s see, it’s more difficult that you would believe. For example with this gig we had plenty of time to get organized, but yet things ALWAYS conspire against ‘The Help’ when it comes to rehearsals. Willy got trapped at the wrong end of Ireland on the day we were to have the main final rehearsal, meaning we had to squeeze in a rehearsal after work and before Condemned started to practice during the week of the gig. Total practice time approx 1 hour (by which stage I was buckled with tonsillitis). At least this time we did manage to revamp a few older tunes and write a new one.

Are there any plans for a Lesshelp live DVD, or a sequel to ‘Liveless’?

Yes. That’s definitely the case. The much talked about much discussed DVD will see the light of day eventually. I had tried to get some more live video footage of other shows to add into the DVD. Basically it will be the entire 2002 Limelight show plus footage of other gigs since then including the Decade and the Dickheads shows. There will also be some limited footage of the first ever Lesshelp gig 1994 in the Rosetta bar (if I ever find the tape!) Then we got the documentary and the short movie to sort.

How big an influence is Buckfast on the band’s song writing process?

Well basically the general Lesshelp subject matters are: Buckfast, Metal, Spides and general stupidity. I’m sure a bottle of Bucky or two has been consumed at the time of at least some of the song titles being conceived. . .

If a spide could actually play excellent grindcore guitar, could he audition for the band?

Aye. Reckon he could, would be worth it for the Irony factor alone.

Any sneak previews for upcoming song titles?

Ok. Let’s think.
‘Burn Shell-Suit Burn’
‘Small Scar, No Gravy’
‘Tacky, Tacky, Muck, Muck’
‘Spide Removal Machine’
‘Diddley Dee To The nth Degree’
‘She Would Need To Shut Up’
‘Hammered, Lobstered, Toilet-Seated’
‘What Is That Coat He’s Wearing’

- Donal McBrien 18/11/10